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Post by Ken'ichi on Oct 23, 2006 20:27:33 GMT -5
Greetings AAAB members,
As some of you may know, recently an incident occured about an old incident coming back again. Sadly this incident has resulted in the leave of two members, and I'm concerned this incident may result from the leave of other members.
I want to apologize to the boards and to the members who have left for this incident getting out of hand, I want to thank Night Bear for being there to help stop it before it got even more out of hand.
I am deeply sorry this happened and hope this won't happen again. A warning has been issued about it already and hopefuly it won't resurface agian.
I hope none of this causes another member of the board to leave, and once again I'm sorry about this.
Your moderator,
Ken'ichi
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Post by Night Bear on Oct 23, 2006 20:29:39 GMT -5
You're welcome. And don't worry, I won't leave. ^^
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Post by nadine on Oct 23, 2006 21:17:53 GMT -5
Sorry if that incident got out of hand, but a lot of troubles has been happening ever since the early incident that happen to me and Kia about our fourms. And don't worry, I won't leave either. But if more troubles like this continue to keep up, I'll have to stay away from the boards for a while, but I promise to stay here if anyone needs me. And I don't wanna be banned for good.  |
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Post by Night Bear on Oct 23, 2006 21:31:38 GMT -5
Just try to be careful next time, Nadine. Be considerate of other people's feelings. Even if you don't like that person, it doesn't give you the right to attack them in anyway. If they make you mad, just get up and walk away. Don't shout back and make the problem worse.
And I hope that this will calm down the atmosphere, and hopefully incidents like this won't happen again. This is supposed to be a friendly board where people should have fun roleplaying, showing off their work, meeting new people, etc. I hope everyone understands what I'm trying to say.
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Post by nadine on Oct 23, 2006 22:17:03 GMT -5
I understand what you're saying to say Night Bear, but I didn't know it was gonna get out of hand. Everytime I try to say something that's true or whenever I want to point out something, I get blamed and yelled at too easily and I don't want that to happen to me anymore. Everyone gets me upset so easily, I think it's cause they wanna get on my nerves. It's like everything I say sounds wrong and then turns into a big huge fight.
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Post by Night Bear on Oct 23, 2006 22:21:45 GMT -5
It's not because they want to get on your nerves or because what you say is true. It's because what you say hurt them or upset them. For example, you were wrong to say that Nakia is too obsessed. This was never true. That's why Nakia and Dakotaa got upset. You were blaming Nakia for something that was not true.
So next time, think before you say something. And just because you think it's true doesn't mean you should say it. The truth hurts sometimes. So there is a time and a place to say certain things, and sometimes you just shouldn't say them at all. I'm not encouraging lying here, just so you know. Being honest is the right thing to do, yes. But being honest and being rude are two different things.
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Post by nadine on Oct 23, 2006 22:30:59 GMT -5
I don't know who I find is obessed anymore, but a lot of fans with fan-made pairings can get a bit crazy and fight a lot to see which one gets more attention than the other. I guess I'm just pissed cause my pairing hasn't done so well cause my anger problems kept getting in the way and I don't mean to get people upset on purpose. But I think you're right. I somehow do tend to say stuff without thinking. Even if it's the right or wrong thing to do, people tend to do or say stupid and crazy stuff that may or may not be a true fact.
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Post by Night Bear on Oct 23, 2006 22:32:41 GMT -5
Well hopefully this topic won't be brought up again.
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Post by nadine on Oct 23, 2006 22:34:50 GMT -5
I hope not. I feel like it's all my fault. Even if I'm saying something that's not true, I get blamed for everything. First with the flaming Nita thing and now this. Why do I get the feeling I'm being punished?  |
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Post by Night Bear on Oct 23, 2006 22:36:12 GMT -5
Probably because you feel guilty.
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Post by nadine on Oct 23, 2006 22:39:23 GMT -5
Maybe...I notice Nakia left the boards too and close down her own roleplay. I knew it couldn't work out too good. Because there's always gonna be fans who have pairings for the same character, but with a different mate and they tend to cause problems all the times, even to others.
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Post by Night Bear on Oct 23, 2006 22:42:40 GMT -5
It would have worked out just fine, actually. I could see a lot of potential in it. But with the argument and two members leaving, I guess Nakia felt too upset to continue the RP, despite all the potential it still had. I do feel upset that even Nakia decided to leave. I never expected it to happen, but we cannot change the past.
Anyway, let's just put this topic to rest.
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Post by nadine on Oct 23, 2006 22:47:14 GMT -5
I suppose, but I'm a bit suprised Nakia left also. If only Kia didn't stop being my friend, this wouldn't had happen. I don't go down so easily when I get my feelings hurt after a friend dumps me like that. I do whatever I can to make peace with them again, but I can't make peace with someone if they don't wanna come back to be my friend again. I've already lost too much with what I love and now they're gone.
But I don't wanna be reminded about that ever again and it does happen again, I swear I will lose it. But I'll do whatever I can to control my temper.
Anyway I think you're right Night Bear. Let's have this topic closed before it gets out of hand again.
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Post by Night Bear on Oct 23, 2006 23:15:11 GMT -5
Nadine, don't blame this all on Nakia, okay? If someone decides not to be your friend anymore, you should respect their decision and stop bothering them about it. You should not try and force them to be friends with you once more. That's the wrong thing to do.
I am not saying it's your fault Nadine. But what I am saying is this: you shouldn't say it's all anyone's fault.
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Post by Epesi on Oct 24, 2006 5:49:14 GMT -5
That's up to the admins, but I don't see why this thread should be closed. Whether a fight erupts here comes down to whether one of us starts one; and I think none of us wants that to happen.
Night Bear's right, Nadine, and I hope you take her advice to heart. It's not all your fault, but that doesn't mean you're totally innocent either. We're not trying to make you feel upset and guilty, but it's important for you to take responsibility for your actions. Only if you recognize your mistakes can you avoid repeating them in the future.
That means if you don't want things to get "out of hand" again, you need to be willing to do this yourself. You can't expect others not to make you angry; in a perfect world everyone would be mindful of each others' feelings, but this isn't a perfect world. People will make you angry, whether they mean to or not; even your closest friends might make you feel bad without realizing it. You just have to make the choice, yourself, not to lash out when you are angry. It's all up to you.
You know the Smokey the Bear slogan? The same thing applies to flame wars. XD
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